It seems grooming products and water are my themes of the moment.
Anyway, this is real…..I saw a display in town for this stuff. I really am not making this up. Laura Mercier Flawless Skin is real, honestly....It says (and I quote)
‘Remarkable skincare based on the anti-ageing properties of Deep Sea Water extracted off the coast of Japan’
Yes that’s right – salty water! I like the word ‘extracted’ too – it all sounds better than dipping a bucket in the sea at Cleethorpes but it’s the same thing. I’m going to market Tracy Pleb's ‘Imperfect Skin’ – based on the salty water properties of a fat bloke with a bucket in Clacton. Could knock it out for a fraction of the price. Same thing but loads cheaper.
While I'm on, have you noticed that loads of shampooey types things have 'aqua' as the first ingredient. They often have 'liquidium parafinium' in too! That'd be water and liquid parafin in cod Latin then would it - faecesium shittinitium then. Soylent Green for these people I think. Oh yes.