Much as it pains me to leave the 4-day party which is my rock and roll / acoustic Christmas (must do a Christmas album incidentally, chunky jumper et al), I thought it my duty to report in from the cutting edge of acoustic singer-songwriterdom to you little people who buy my records making my life so decadent and luxurious. You’re probably wondering what a top star such as myself gets bought for Christmas eh?
Well, here’s a short list of my favourite presents:
10 M&S white cotton hankies
1 drawstring laundry bad
1 purple party joke wig
1 turkey basting brush
2 pairs Matalan socks
1 Matalan sweatshirt
1 Matalan jumper (wool cycle, dry flat, re-shape while damp)
and a fucking partridge in a pear tree eh?
Ho Ho Ho!