"Everything happens for a reason"

I heard someone say 'I think everything happens for a reason' recently.  Well, I would like to say that that idea is offensive nonsense (I'm offended, call the police!)  The idea that some cosmic force is hurling children to their deaths in the road or making you redundant so you can learn something new about your inner self - I think the word HALFWIT was invented for this sort of talk.  The universe would be a truly scary place if reason had anything at all to do with all the bad stuff that happens.  Randomness is scary but the idea that something was organising it all would be truly horrible!

Fish know better (cod philosophy, geddit?!)

...and if anyone posts any more of those damned homilies on Facebook (or anywhere I can see them!) I will kill them (oop, it's the police again!)

You know the sort of thing - generally starts with "A true friend..."  I suggest A true friend "will tell you to shut the fuck up when you're talking like a halfwit"

Incidentally I do like the word halfwit.  So far I'm not aware of anyone bleating on about how offensive it is.

I just spellchecked this post - Blogger spellcheck suggests that 'offensive' is wrong!